A Practical Joke that Worked

For 11 years I have been trying to pull the same practical joke, but to no avail. Here is the set-up:

Friday nights prior to home football games the Iowa Football team stays at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in Downtown Cedar Rapids. Those with the team on this night are coaches, medical personnel and myself, the video guy. Immediately upon arrival the team proceeds to the top floor for dinner. As you can see by the adjacent photo players are divided up into round tables of 8. Typically players sit with one another, coaches sit among themselves with the Head Coach, Coordinators and Graduate Assistants at their own table in the corner. Near them sit the medical and video staffs.

Prior to the team's arrival I drive to Cedar Rapids with a different student on my staff to set up video equipment and have a meal before bringing the University vehicle back to Iowa City. That students sits with us for dinner.

Once everyone is seated Head Coach Kirk Ferentz covers the details of meeting times and locations before asking for a volunteer to "return thanks" prior to dinner. The person who gives the blessing will then have their table excused first for the buffet lines.

For the past 11 years I have instructed the student who joins me for hotel set up to raise their hand and "return thanks" so the table of video and medical may enter the buffet line first. Everytime the video student is very reluctant and Coach Ferentz points to one of the players. My reaction is always a disappointing shake of the head as we bow our heads. However this past Friday night it was a different outcome.

Michael, a volunteer assistant joined me on our trek to Cedar Rapids. Michael is a very excited young man to have the opportunity to be apart of the Iowa Football team. As we finished setting up the equipment and waited for a late arriving football team I told him to be ready to return thanks for dinner. He looked at me with a puzzled look on his face and asked me what he should say. "Just give thanks for the food and for allowing us this opportunity. Keep it short."

After about 45 minutes the team arrived and met on the 16th floor for dinner. As we sat down at our table Michael asked, "Do I stand or sit." Thinking he was going along with the joke I said, "oh, you can sit down."

Coach Ferentz approached the middle of the room with the instructions, "alright meetings at the same time. 8:30 and 8:45. Anybody want to return thanks?" He looks around the room and with conviction and certainty Michael throws his hand in the air. I look and begin to tell him to bring his hand down while Abby Wieck, assistant medical trainer looks to him agasp as to what is about to happen.

Kirk sees Julien VanDeVelde, but then switches his gaze to Michael and calls upon him. My head sunk into my hands as I hear Michael say, "Thank you for this opportunity and the blessings bestowed upon us..........Amen."

My head remained in my hands as I laughed so hard tears flowed from my eyes. All eyes were on our table with all players wondering, "Who is this guy?" Finally after about a minute I compose myself, raise my head and say, "You are the first person to ever do that." Michael was proud and didn't know he had been the butt of a practical joke. I look around and see kickers Daniel Murray and Trent Mossbrucker with a confused look on their face. As players finished their dinner and exited the room, all had the same question, "Who is that with Engelbert?"

I finished my meal early looking for more. I went back to the buffet line only to find Coach Ferentz. His question to me was about what the Chicago Cubs would do with Milton Bradley, but his son James interrupted by saying, "that was the best prayer of the year." Before Coach could answer I turned and headed directly back to my table.

A joke that started over a decade ago with over twenty video students as possible targets, one finally fell for it. However we were still the last table to be excused for dinner.